Hi Jahar! I really like your poem, its style has shades of "The Love Song Of J. Alfred Prufock" by T.S. Eliot (one of my favorites), and a bit of Ginsberg's "Howl". Nice imagery and lyricism, I especially like the lines:




Until you move, Oh that graceful sway!


Until you smile and drink my soul away




Who are your favorite poets? (& writers in general?)




Toper

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Replying to:

hello,




The Void




There is a place, a place I call Void...




In my mind there is a place


A plain cavern, a bare space


Blue flame dancing on the center


with a dry ledge of alabaster




I solely enter that abode


And yet I'm not entierly alone


With me are my emotions


that for a day wrapped my bones




With me are my mask, my mix-up feelings


In the flame I feed them, and watch them seething


On the ledge I put my emotions, till I'm only me


I assume the Nothingness, until I am free




Only then will I look at you


Seeing you as you are


With a mind that has no grasping thoughts


In the Void, I'll observe from afar




Without mental comment of what you do


It's only in the Void that I see true


There, I'm not clouded by my deceitful feelings


There, without my mask, I see your hue




Your true self only then will I see


Only then will I know that you're not so above me




Until you move, Oh that graceful sway!


Until you smile and drank my soul away


Until you walked thatshouts your social standing


How long can I keep the Nothingness going?




Then you turn and held his hands


I saw two wings that flew as one


Then you hugged to my lament


The ledge gave in, the flame was rent




The Void shattered, the Nothingness collapsed


I lay there weeping, the fragments I clasp




The Void was good, tis my retreat


When for a day I feel defeat


But then you came to my dismay


How can I make the Nothingness stay?




The Void was strong before you came


Now its as dust, It aint the same...






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newbie here!

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Replying to:

Do you guys have any poems na pwedeng "pang-Hallmark greeting card" and dating? Maybe stuff you wrote way back in highschool, or nung time na in-love na in-love ka? Post them here!